Thursday, June 12, 2008

I'll Admit It--I Like The Rock!

There are certain humans that I hate more than others, but there are also certain humans that I like--even love--more than others. (YES! Even your Fearsome Lord Klaktu is, at times, but a servant to the demands of his mighty quadruple hearts!) Now, I've been as shy as a Tigerthian shade-lily about this before, but the time has come to stop being ashamed and just admit it: I like The Rock!
Your Earth publication Entertainment Weekly has a really great story in their June 13 issue about him!
"He's one of the hardest-working people on behalf of a movie I've worked with," says Oren Aviv, president of production for Walt Disney Studios. "He's the guy who's constantly saying, 'What else can I do?' That puts him in a unique category of less than a handful of actors working today."
In this Vicious Ruler's august judgment (the very same judgment that shall soon rain thousands of thousands of molten asteroids upon your pathetic planet, scrubbing it clean of damnable thetans! MARK KLAKTU'S WORDS!), The Rock's charm and comedic instincts contrast excellently with his ability to keep subservient and pathetic individuals in line with "The People's Elbow."

Forsooth, indeed Earth is marked for destruction by L. Ron (REJOICE AT HIS NAME!), and only a marked few shall escape its decimation! The Rock, you are formally invited to join us. I believe I could make good use of your talents, be it in the brutal spice mines of Tecton or in the PR department of Estrox Prime. If you are interested, The Rock, please holo-vox me at sigma code 45XttR-KLAKTU, or, if Earth's laughably primitive technology stands in the way, send me one of your quaint "electronic mails" to Your Terrible Emperor looks forward to hearing from you soon, The Rock!

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